Best Conspiracy Theory Yet

I have found the single greatest bit of conspiracy thinking yet as to why President Bush won re-election earlier this month. This is guaranteed to blow your socks off, so I will give you a moment to gather yourself up and take a deep breath before plunging in. This bit of juicy stupidity comes to us by way of a community journal and so it's difficult to know exactly who to credit it to. So, here we go:

Magical Election Ta pering: SHUT IT DOWN!

Ok, I can understand the restlessness I've been feeling since yesterday. There's a lot riding on this election, and passions are running high on both sides, so naturally eceryone and their naked brother who has an ounce of Power and no clue about Shielding is leaking energy like a hair dryer in a bathtub. So it's Shields Up for me, but I'm still getting enough bleedover to make me jittery and a little manic if I don't concentrate. That's all to be expected.



What wasn't expected was that once I filtered out all that background noise, I started hearing a calm, resonable, and powerful head-voice saying things like "Kerry doesn't have the experience we need in these troubled times." and "Give Bush a chance to make it better."



Anyone who knows me KNOWS these are not my thoughts! And besides, I voted last week. No, there's no way in Hades these are my thoughts.



Gods-damn it! The f*cking Republicans have got Magical help pumping out a clear, unified, focused broadcast, and you can be sure, every sensitive is picking it up. These are the people most likely to vote Kerry, and I'd like to think they are resolute enough not to be swayed by telepathic subliminal advertising, but it's such a rarely-done thing, and so few people are properly trained these days, that I fear it will be more effective. Just watch and see who says "I was going to vote for Kerry, but for some reason I changed my mind at the last minute."



Who would be doing this for them? Gee, who are the Mages driving around in those black Mercedes and Lincolns with the tinted windows? The ones who live in the mansions with the hell-hounds in the yard and the 7-foot tall hairless black doormen? Every town has some, the bigger the town, the more of these "High Magi" you will find.



I have no idea what their agenda may be, but you can be damn sure the welfare of the common human on the street is not a part of it.



So shield, people, shield. And screen. And if you can shield a polling place, do it! I'm not saying to try to interfere with people's choices, but rather prevent them from being interfered with.



This is important, people, and it may be too late already.

The most ironic part of the whole post is that this person heard a "head" voice in the calm and instead of deciding that maybe it was common sense calling, he/she immediately decided that it must be mind warfare. You have to give liberals credit for one thing, they sure know how to hold onto a belief regardless of what experience, sense, or reason might tell them.