Well...It's been a while since I felt there was one person worthy enough of the Tool Award. It seems like everyone has been spending so much time in the toolshed that it was hard to narrow it down to one. But finally we've had one person dumb enough to stick his head above the crowd again. I suppose I owe him a debt of gratitude since he helped me finally find a reason to bring the Tool Award back out. So, without further ado...
Thank you, Rep. Joe Barton for helping to re-enforce every negative stereotype about Republicans. Doesn't care about the "little guy" who has been devastated by the oil disaster? Check! Absurd pandering to the oil industry? Check! Ridiculous hyperbole implying that a crime had been committed in requiring a company to clean up its own mess? Check!
You sir, are truly one-of-a-kind. Or I sure hope to God that you are, anyway. But maybe I should give you some credit. After all, it must be difficult to go against the stream here. We have so many reports of the unparalleled damage that this spill will cause and so much talk about the economic cost to the Gulf Coast. But no one has really discussed how much this is going to hurt poor BP. That poor corporation that has taken its turn making record profits off of oil sales for all these years. It's just outrageous that they should be expected to part with a tiny fraction of their massive earnings to clean up this mess that...you know...they made.
So, Rep, Barton, thank you for putting the interest of this poor, hurting company above the interest of all those who have died, become ill, and lost their livelihoods because of this disaster. It's good to know that someone is looking out for the big guy still. You sir, are a tool.
Welcome back, Tool Award. I missed you so. ;-)
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